Rest In Peace

After all the miles are run
Over gentle stones and humble mountains
Over raging rivulets, thundering storms
Mighty chasms from whence darkness looks into our souls
Infected, hurt, half-healed and half-given-up...
All the miles are run
All the pain has now become
A proof-less, hazy memory

After all the words are said
Tender remonstrations of love
A thousand "I love you"s a day, none meant
A thousand more "I wish you'd understand"s, none said
A million "I'm sorry"s all in cocktails of rum and tears drunk
A million more "Why?"s, none answered
And many many "That's why..."s piled on sky high, sky high...
Grudges, piled on grudges, all swept under a threadbare carpet...
After all the words have been said
My words have now become
Masks to wear to a farce -
Horseplay and gaudy sentimentality

Somewhere I erred
Somewhere right at the start
I spoke but did not hear
I heard but did not see
I saw but did not notice
What we had set out to be
'Us' was a bond forged with love
My love for you and yours for me
But in my hurry to love
I left no pause for being me, becoming me.

Being was good, until I became
Un-me, unlike what I had promised I would be
Living in violation of rules and regulations
Commissions and stipulations
Riddled with misgivings and speculations
Misunderstandings borne of miscommunications
All spurious issues of an epileptic imagination
...Words
They're trash today, see how they confuse and obfuscate
I pimp them shamelessly
Invalidate their validity

It all comes down to what has been said
And unsaid
Meant and un-meant
Proved and disproved
My words are the devil's advocates today
Erasing and rewriting lines
Between good and gone-bad
See what's become of my pride, my power
Words become whores to fakery
Honesty laid to rest in peace
Garrotted with infidelity

Peace, gentle mind, go in peace
Madness has its own reality.